Piece of Cake
by Olive Tree Hugger
Summary: In which everyone wants a slice. Poor, poor General Iroh II.
1. Chapter 1

**I wrote this fan fiction on a whim. I think General Iroh II is a beautiful character and a rather impressive testimony to the Fire Nation royal family lineage (Let's face it, even Lord Sozin was kind of hot—Fire Nation joke!). Since Iroh II was only in three episodes last season, we weren't able to truly enjoy his presence. However, I believe that he's exactly like his grandfather, Zuko. He's the fandom cake; everyone wants a slice of that.**

**Onto the summary: While Iroh II stays on Air Temple Island, his patience is severely tested when everyone suddenly wants a piece of him. Shenanigans ensue.**

**Get ready for both strange and predictable pairings, and then some rather…unorthodox, crack-tastic displays of affection.**

**Oh, **_**yes**_**. **

* * *

Breaching

Iroh sighed in content as he stepped out of the tub. He repressed the urge to squeak like a child when the cool air hit his previously warmed skin. The general hurriedly reached for a towel and wrapped it around his hips. He felt droplets of water running down his back, legs and chest. It tickled him with chills, but it wasn't totally unpleasant.

As he exited the washroom, he strolled into his bedroom. He expected to slip into his uniform and visit Asami in the courtyard. Ah, Miss Sato. He remembered her huge, pale green eyes sparkling as he asked to meet her there. '_It's a date',_ she'd replied, her luscious black mane flowing in the wind behind them. The thought of the raven-haired beauty made a rare smile breach Iroh's features.

"You have the loveliest dimples." A voice declared.

Iroh gasped, turning to the direction of the sound and he raised he his hands up, ready to fight the intruder. But when he saw a pair of orange and yellow robes emerge from his wardrobe, he realized that he actually had _two_ intruders.

Two _little_ intruders.

Jinora and Ikki, the two female air benders, stepped out of the wardrobe and stared up at him, smiling pleasantly. Ikki, the hyper child, waved at him. Her sister giggled at his bare chest.

Iroh felt unbelievably mortified to have two juveniles in his bedroom. _What were they doing? _He thought. _Or better yet, how did they get in?_

He tried to joke about it, "You know, ladies, it's wrong to infringe on a man's privacy while he's nude."

Jinora shrugged and stated matter-of-factly, "You aren't exactly nude, General Iroh, sir. You have a towel over your midsection."

Ikki nodded in agreement then started to babble. "So were you taking a bath? What kind of soap did you use? Was it the cherry blossom one we gave you? Do you use soap in the Fire Nation? I bet you do, you all look so comely."

Iroh completely ignored the younger child's inquiries and turned to the older, reprimanding gently, "You shouldn't be here. What if your father finds out?"

At the thought of Tenzin realizing that his only daughters were in a room with a naked man, and realizing that it was Iroh, well…the prince certainly didn't want to delve into that leeway. _Dishonor, dishonor, dishonor…_

Jinora placed a hand over her chest, seeming offended and she uttered, "We just wanted to see what being a general was like."

The man raised an eyebrow, asking, "Commander Bumi is your Uncle, correct? Why don't you ask him? And do it in less…_unceremonious_ conditions." He gripped the towel against him and stared hard at the two sisters.

Ikki started up with the questions once again, "So, isn't your mom Zuko's daughter? He gave her the throne, so that makes her the Fire Lord, but isn't she married? So wouldn't your _dad_ be the Fire Lord and your _mom_ the Fire Lady? Is that the same thing? Or does your mom have a special title?"

Iroh felt a shiver up trail down his spine. He was starting to get cold in his undressed state. He needed to get dressed and….

ASAMI! The thought of Miss Sato waiting for him in the courtyard slammed into his mind. She probably thought he was jilting her. He groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose, a habit he picked up from his grandfather.

"Look," he scolded the children, "why don't you two leave so I can get dressed? I have an appointment."

Ikki prodded, "With Asami?"

Jinora added, "She's super pretty."

Iroh smiled a bit then. "Yes. She is."

Jinora sighed as she caught sight of his dimples. "You are so handsome." She exhaled.

Ikki started to hop, making Iroh believe that she might have some kind of sugar problem. The girl pondered as she jumped onto an air scooter, "How old are you, General? Isn't Fire Lord Zuko like, 87? That's a huge number! He's 80 years older than me! I know Gran-Gran Katara's almost his age. Did you know they were friends growing up?"

Iroh could only address the first question, honestly having tuned her out after that. He sighed, "I'm much older than you, that's for sure."

Jinora beamed at him, saying, "General, you remind me of an illustration I saw in a novel once about two lovers who couldn't be together so they built a cave-"

The general cleared his throat and waved his hand at them, gesturing that he wished they leave.

The girls huffed and puffed but still complied with his request. They shuffled out of the room and as Ikki began closing the door, she stuck her black haired head past the threshold and singsonged, "If it doesn't work out with Asami, you know where to find me. You'll only have to wait ten years!"


	2. Chapter 2

**I wrote this fan fiction on a whim. I think General Iroh II is a beautiful character and a rather impressive testimony to the Fire Nation royal family lineage (Let's face it, even Lord Sozin was kind of hot—Fire Nation joke!). Since Iroh II was only in three episodes last season, we weren't able to truly enjoy his presence. However, I believe that he's exactly like his grandfather, Zuko. He's the fandom cake; everyone wants a slice of that.**

**Onto the summary: While Iroh II stays on Air Temple Island, his patience is severely tested when everyone suddenly wants a piece of him. Shenanigans ensue.**

**Get ready for both strange and predictable pairings, and then some rather…unorthodox, crack-tastic displays of affection.**

**Oh, **_**yes**_**. **

* * *

Flames

After Iroh finished combing his fine, black hair, he left his room excitedly. Hopefully, the two air children would not be disrupting him again.

On his way to the courtyard, where the delightful Miss Sato awaited him, Iroh was shocked to see Mako, the young fire bender, approaching him. As soon as their golden eyes met, Iroh was faced with an ultimatum.

As a general and a prince, Iroh wanted to act as respectful and kind to Mako as possible, but as a potential suitor of Miss Sato's, he also wanted to beat the snot out of the boy's face for breaking Asami's heart. _What would Grandfather do?_ He reckoned.

But Iroh opted for the honorable way: he would simply ignore Mako. He turned a sharp right, getting closer to the courtyard. The younger man ran after him, shouting, "General!"

He strolled faster, ignoring the young man's cries for attention.

"Hey, General Iroh!"

"Over here, man!"

"Yo! Iroh!"

The general stifled a snarl; _did this boy want a flaming foot up his rectum?_

He started to sprint, trying his best to tune out Mako's voice.

What he didn't know was that Mako had stopped chasing him and instead sent a ball of flames into Iroh's back.

Being a master fire bender, Iroh could sense the heat sailing towards him. He spun around and swiftly, expertly, extinguished the fire with his own roundhouse kick. He punched the air in front of him, and a spectacular blaze erupted from his fist. Mako stood his ground and absorbed the fire, pushing away the remaining embers.

Iroh glared at him, now Mako wore a regretful expression on his face.

"Hey, man, I just wanted to talk to you." He uttered.

Iroh felt his jaw clench and he muttered, "If I didn't have a previous engagement with the lovely Miss Sato, I would have burnt you and your stupidly shaped eyebrows into a crisp."

Said stupidly shaped eyebrows shot up and Mako asked, totally stupefied, "Y-y-you're dating Asami?"

Iroh felt satisfied, seeing a sad look pass over the younger male's features. "Indeed," he said. It was a total lie, but he'd say anything to upset this crummy, underdressed little breaker of Asami's heart.

Then he turned around, head held high and nose even higher, and marched his way towards his destination.

He heard Mako gasp shrilly, "Holy Agni!"

Iroh craned his neck back and raised his eyebrow at the man. Suddenly, he felt a light breeze enter through the seat of his pants and he shivered as it ran up his spine.

For a moment, he thought it was the two air children playing tricks on him, so he growled, "Jinora! Ikki!"

Mako held back a giggle and pointed at Iroh's butt, "Your ass is showing, General."

The royal froze in his spot, as more natural wind ran up his exposed bottom and a blush colored his pale face.

And then Mako continued, his eyes glinting, "And it's one hell of a nice ass, if you ask me. Is that a birthmark? It's shaped like a star! Can I touch it?"

Then Iroh's gloved hands flew to cover the skin and he dashed back to his quarters, completely mortified.


	3. Chapter 3

**I wrote this fan fiction on a whim. I think General Iroh II is a beautiful character and a rather impressive testimony to the Fire Nation royal family lineage (Let's face it, even Lord Sozin was kind of hot—Fire Nation joke!). Since Iroh II was only in three episodes last season, we weren't able to truly enjoy his presence. However, I believe that he's exactly like his grandfather, Zuko. He's the fandom cake; everyone wants a slice of that.**

**Onto the summary: While Iroh II stays on Air Temple Island, his patience is severely tested when everyone suddenly wants a piece of him. Shenanigans ensue.**

**Get ready for both strange and predictable pairings, and then some rather…unorthodox, crack-tastic displays of affection.**

**Oh, **_**yes**_**. **

* * *

A Mother's Love

Iroh had nightmares of this very moment dozens of times as a teenager. He'd woken up nearly screaming in fear of such a humiliating occurrence.

And here he thought the "naked in public" dream would never come true.

The general covered his revealed buttocks with the palms of his hands, cursing every Spirit he knew of, as he slinked around the island, frequently ducking behind trees or statues whenever someone came into view. He snuck about, rushing from flower bush to bush, from rock to tree, heart pounding the whole time. He saw an opening between his current hiding place-a leechy nut shrub-and the main walkway leading to the private quarters. He waited for two air nuns to pass by before making the beeline.

He pushed off of his feels and went running, both palms covering the burnt seat of his pants.

Just as he went into the clear, something even more mortifying than getting your pants burned and having to walk around with your ass showing happened.

"General?"

Iroh clenched his eyes shut and mentally crapped on every sacred being in the cosmic universe. He stood there, tense as a statue, with his hands over his derriere, and eyes closed. He prayed that Pema would just leave and forget that she'd ever seen him that way. But of course, the universe _had_ to prove him wrong.

"General, is that you?" The young mother's voice was full of laughter.

_Agni, is there _nothing_ more degrading? _He thought, before spinning around and throwing her a dazzling, princely grin.

"Hello, Mrs. Pema." He greeted.

The woman returned the smile and offered him a quizzical, yet understanding look. She asked, "General Iroh, your pants seem to have-"

"I know. That the scarf-wearing hooligan has ruined them permanently." He replied a bit too quickly.

She pressed the tips of her fingers over her mouth and held back a giggle. Iroh momentarily saw a teenager under the yellow and deep orange robes of the air mother.

"Yes, well," she started, "I was just about to do the laundry. Would you like me to get you a new pair while I…mend yours?"

Iroh pursed his lips in thought and nodded, stating, "Thank you, Mrs. Pema."

The woman offered him another kind, warm smile. "Please, just Pema will be fine."

The general accepted it and followed her to the laundry vicinity. He found multiple baskets of clothing-most of them yellow and orange- stacked onto each other. There was a large metal basin in the middle of the floor, and a wooden scrubber leaning against it. Pema crossed the floor and started to shuffle through the heaps of clothing, occasionally holding a set of robes up to her nose to sniff them.

Iroh watched her work, his eyes set on her small but strong hands. He didn't realize how tiny Pema was until he'd seen her up close. Standing behind Tenzin, a tall and domineering man, she did look petite but not nearly as much as she did now.

A small part of Iroh wanted to curl his arms around the woman and squeeze.

Pema turned to him, wielding a set of robes identical to those of the acolytes, and ordered, "Put this on."

Iroh took the robe from her hands and took a step back, realizing that his ass was now visible. He also realized that he had nowhere to change his clothing. He cleared his throat and tried using his general voice on her,

"Pema, I don't have a private place to redress."

She turned to him and smiled again. "Of course, you do. Right there, don't worry, I won't look."

His jaw dropped and he started to stutter, "But Pema, you certainly can't expect me to just….I mean…"

Pema giggled and replied, "Oh, you think I haven't seen manly parts before? I've had four children, general. I think I know."

He blushed, and rubbed the back of his arm. He answered, "It's not that, it's just not proper…"

"Proper?" She asked, raising an eyebrow. "General, we're in a tiny laundry room. Proper or not, you have no other place to change."

Iroh sighed, defeated. She shrugged and replied, "If it's any consolation, I'll cover my eyes and turn around. I promise, I won't peek."

She did exactly as she said she would. Iroh watched her turn around and cover her face. Yes, it gave him consolation, if only a little. He quickly started to unbutton his uniform coat and slipped out of his undershirt.

Pema started to talk, which surprised him. She said, "Meelo, the little dickens, thought it would be a good idea to let the lemurs run free in the pantry. Of course, I had to clean it up before Tenzin came home. And then one of the lemurs got into his office and made a mess of things, sending him into one of his tizzies."

Iroh responded awkwardly, "That's rough, buddy."

She continued, completely unaware of the clumsy reply, "And Ikki won't stop asking about her bending tattoos. 'When am I going to get 'em, Mom?' I don't know! I wish they'd bother their father for a change."

Iroh, now slipping into the robes, replied, "It sounds like you've got a lot on your plate."

Pema nodded, saying, "Oh, and don't even mention the chores. Sometimes the nuns help me, but it's too much! Tenzin is trying to rebuild an entire nation overnight. That's not going to work out!"

The general started pulling at the ties on his robe, clumsily knotting them together. He cleared his throat and she turned to see him.

She smiled again, this time showing her teeth. Iroh felt gauche in Air Nomad clothing, if anything.

"My, my, don't we look handsome." She teased. She stepped over to him, and gently rearranged the ties to look better.

As she worked, Iroh got a good look at her face. Being the mother of four young children made Pema age more than she should have. She was possibly thirty-five, thirty-six perhaps, but she had soft wrinkles surrounding her eyes, two very delicate marionette lines graced the corners of her mouth, and her hair was laced with soft grays here and there.

She was pretty good looking for a mother, Iroh reckoned. Being in his twenties himself, she couldn't possibly pass as his alma mater, but she did a damn well job of being maternal to him.

Pema's big grey eyes glinted at him and she grinned, saying, "My mother was right; all fire benders are hot."

Another blush tickled Iroh's face and she continued, "Temperature-wise. You're very warm."

"Oh, right." He answered, and suddenly, she was shooing him out of the laundry room.

"Come on, now, get a move on." She said, "I have laundry to do."

Suddenly remembering Asami, Iroh nodded and replied before running off, "Thank you, Pema!" Watching as his robes flapped about in the wind, Pema muttered to herself,

"I would tuck him in _any_ night."


	4. Chapter 4

**I wrote this fan fiction on a whim. I think General Iroh II is a beautiful character and a rather impressive testimony to the Fire Nation royal family lineage (Let's face it, even Lord Sozin was kind of hot—Fire Nation joke!). Since Iroh II was only in three episodes last season, we weren't able to truly enjoy his presence. However, I believe that he's exactly like his grandfather, Zuko. He's the fandom cake; everyone wants a slice of that.**

**Onto the summary: While Iroh II stays on Air Temple Island, his patience is severely tested when everyone suddenly wants a piece of him. Shenanigans ensue.**

**Get ready for both strange and predictable pairings, and then some rather…unorthodox, crack-tastic displays of affection.**

**Oh, **_**yes**_**. **

* * *

**Wisdom**

The wind blew at the fire bender like a relentless tornado. As he struggled to walk to the courtyard, still praying to Agni that Asami was there, his borrowed robes flapped and swished awkwardly around him.

It was like the dead air benders were trying to spite him.

He stopped trying to push against the air for a moment, instead opting to stop in his tracks. He glared up at the sky and asked,

"What? You don't like that I'm wearing your clothing?"

He didn't expect someone to answer. Tenzin's soft spoken but deep voice replied, "I don't think they mind."

The young prince looked over his shoulder to see the older air bender standing before him. The wind blew at his robes softer now. In respect of Aang's son, Iroh bowed and said,

"I apologize. It wasn't my right to say."

Tenzin simply shook his head and responded, "It's alright, general. I'm sure you've had a rough day."

Iroh was about to explain all of his inconveniences that had barred him from courting the pretty Miss Sato but stopped when he remembered that Tenzin's two young _daughters_ had been in his bedroom while he was naked. Such a dishonor would be placed on his shoulders.

Instead Iroh cleared his throat and said simply, "My clothes were defiled is all. Your wife allowed me to dress like this. She's very kind."

The older male nodded, a glint of pride in his grey eyes.

Iroh smiled in return, fully prepared to make his leave. The monk continued to speak, however, commenting, "You resemble your grandfather, general."

The younger male said, somewhat surprised, "Yes, you know my grandfather. Of course."

Tenzin replied, "Yes. He and my father were good friends, as your mother is a dear friend of mine. Let me tell you something, Prince Iroh, about the Fire Nation's royal family."

Iroh raised an eyebrow, prompting the monk to continue.

The air bender said, stroking his beard, "You're all destined for great things. Your great-great-great grandfather was Avatar Roku, your grandfather defeated his sister in Agni Kai and became Fire Lord, your namesake owned a chain of successful tea shops all around the Earth Kingdom, your mother is Fire Lady, and you, general, will one day be Fire Lord. Yes, you are indeed destined to be great."

The prince's mind marinated in this information for a moment. "Hmm," he said lamely, "My grandfather was correct. Air benders are quite wise." With that, he bowed respectfully to Tenzin and hurried off.

Tenzin sighed and smiled slightly, "Perhaps the next fire bending Avatar will come from his lineage."


	5. Chapter 5

Bromance

Iroh had lost his patience long ago. After everything he'd done, all the ways he'd prepared himself for his meeting with Miss Sato, it was all ruined. When he finally arrived at the garden for his date with the heiress, he didn't see the beauty anywhere. All he could find was a note scribbled onto a lacey napkin, and written on that napkin was this,

_"Dear General Iroh,_

_I've decided to go back to Republic City a little early. I have shipping orders to attend to, and I'm sure you have your own duties. Please forgive me for not telling you sooner. _

_Yours truly, Asami Sato."_

He sat, somewhat depressed in that garden for what felt like hours. He curled and uncurled the note in his hand, fuming. He'd leapt and bounded and endured for this girl. And what did he get in return? A note? Not even a goodbye kiss from those luscious dark lips. What a waste…

He sighed again, and heaved himself upwards. Iroh smoothed his robes down and figured to return them, pack his things and go back to the Fire Nation. Unbeknownst to most people, when Iroh was rejected by a woman, he usually spent the rest of his day in his bedroom, binging on fire gummies. He was already thinking about how many he would scarf down when a familiar face popped up.

"Hey, General!" Bolin greeted excitedly.

Slightly taken aback by the brash greeting, Iroh replied, "Uh, hello, Bolin." He started to walk away, when the earth bender stopped him by pulling his arm back. "Whoa," Iroh yelped in surprise. He wretched his arm away and held out a fire ball. He wasn't used to people being so…touchy-feely with him. He was taught to mess up anyone who lay a finger on him during combat.

But to Bolin, this wasn't combat. "Slow down, General Iroh, I won't fight you," he said, backing off, "Just wanted to hang, you know?"

Iroh sighed. What was it with everyone today? Why did they all want a piece of him? He wasn't a cake!

Gently, he turned Bolin down. "Sorry, Bolin, I've been having a tough day."

"Well, yeah, I can tell," Bolin said, looking him over, "you're wearing Air Nomad clothes. Kind of weird."

Iroh sneered, "Well yes, it is rather weird that your hoodlum brother would burn the back of my trousers for no reason!"

"Oooooh," the younger male said, rubbing his chin, "No wonder! Well, I'm sorry about that man. But I bet it's no big deal for you. Because you're a prince, and your mom is the Fire Lord." He cheekily nudged the man's side with an elbow.

"Yes, I know that," Iroh replied impatiently. He really just wanted to get back on his ship and sail away from this crazy place.

The earth bender's posture suddenly changed, and he was slouching. His face darkened. "It must be nice, having everything you've ever wanted right in front of you. Never sleeping in the cold, dirty streets, never starving. You're pretty lucky."

The fire bender felt a small hint of guilt creep its way into his heart. Sometimes he forgot that the Avatar's friends were orphans and homeless for most of their lives. Iroh sighed, and turned to him, replying comfortingly, "You have a home now, and friends. Believe me, the Spirits did you a kindness by not making you royalty."

"What do you mean?" Bolin asked, green eyes going large.

Iroh exhaled deeply, kicking at a rock on the ground. Finally, he spoke, "While we are spoiled and well-fed, my siblings and I are always bossed around by the nobles. We're told how to dress, what to eat, what to study, and we're never allowed to leave the palace alone. It's a prison."

Bolin sat on the stone bench and patted the area next to him. Iroh sat a short distance away. The earth bender said, "But you're the royal. How can they tell you what to do?"

"They think they know what's best for us. My mother says it's just what the nobles do. That I have to get used to it. And they're so much harder on my poor little sister, Su Zin. She's the only girl so they watch her every step, making sure she doesn't do anything dishonorable."

"That's not fair!" Bolin practically exclaimed.

Iroh blew out a sigh. "You're right, Bolin," he said, "but it's our tradition."

"It doesn't have to be that way," Bolin replied, "People in the Earth Kingdom aren't nearly as strict on their royals. My mom is from there."

"That must be nice. Wrong, but nice."

Bolin sighed, leaning back on his hands. "I wonder what life would be like without authority."

Iroh scoffed, "Chaotic."

"You're probably right," the earth bender sheepishly replied.

Suddenly, they heard a faint shout in the distance. It sounded like Bolin's name was being called. "Oh, that's probably Mako," Bolin said, standing, "he and I are going to go get some ice cream sodas. Join us."

Iroh stood as well, but shook his head, saying, "Thank you, but I really should get these clothes back to Pema. Have fun."

The earth bender grinned widely, slapping the general on his shoulder. "Good talk, bro."

Then he rushed out, leaving Iroh to stand by himself in the garden. He suddenly felt better. Having a heart to heart moment with the naïve but sweet earth bender made him forget all about the heiress. He scoffed to himself, _her loss._

He strode out of the garden, proudly, and made his way towards the laundry room. He didn't see Korra slip into the garden after him.

* * *

**Bromance is a reference to the ship "Broh", consisting of Iroh and Bolin. I personally am an Irosami shipper, but I couldn't resist.**


	6. Chapter 6

Familial Relations

After a surprisingly delicious meal courtesy of the air acolytes, Iroh strolled through the gardens of Air Temple Island one last time. After his surprisingly comforting talk with the earth bender, Iroh felt at ease about being on Air Temple Island. And even though he missed the Fire Nation, he decided one last look at the Temple wouldn't hurt. Crossing under the shady canopies of foliage, he quickly learned that the island was home to some very unusual plants. There were flowers and bushes he'd never seen before, so he presumed them to be Air Nomad facets. He neared a fence crisscrossed with vines and leaves. There was a wooden sign strapped to one vine that read in ink:

**"Do not enter"**

Being the law abiding man he was, Iroh resolved not to open the fence. He turned his heels and was about to hike back to the Temple when he heard a sharp grunt from the other side of the greenery-laden door. He froze and listened again. Another, shriller groan sounded and Iroh went into his "swashbuckling hero" mode, landing a powerful kick on the fence door. The fence toppled over with a _thud_ and Iroh rushed inside, thinking someone was hurt. As the fence door fell, Iroh locked eyes with Avatar Korra, who looked like she was in the middle of training. Her arms were raised towards the sky, fists clenched in the way of firebending, and her face was shiny with perspiration. She was in her regular blue and brown attire, sans the fur lined jacket encircling her hips.

The young general raised his eyebrows in surprise and cleared his throat. "Oh, forgive me," he stated as he smoothed his jacket down, "I thought someone was being attacked or something."

Korra slowly lowered her arms and stared at him. She was uncharacteristically silent, which worried Iroh greatly. _Wasn't she normally outgoing and talkative? Why was she staring at him like that?_ He cleared his throat again and bowed this time, repeating, "Forgive me. I'll be on my way."

As he turned around, he heard her voice shout, "Wait, General! Come here, please!"

He decided to obey her, being that she was the Avatar and all. He walked towards her, holding her blue gaze with his gold one. He smiled politely at her and spoke,

"Yes? What is it, Avatar Korra?"

Korra placed her tanned hands over her hips-_her very curvy, luxurious hips_, Iroh observed. She raised an eyebrow at him and asked, "So…_Iroh_. I heard your grandfather is a very popular man."

Iroh furrowed his dark eyebrows at her in confusion. He nodded, and leaned against a brick bench behind him. "Yes, albeit he was very much despised by his father's supporters. It took a lot to gain his nation's trust after the wa-"

She pressed a palm over his mouth, smirking. "That's not what I meant," She purred, her blue eyes boring into him. "Fire Lord Zuko was dodging the honeys left and right, I hear."

Iroh tensed, rather unnerved by the Avatar's cryptic notions. He jerked his head back, away from her hand and uttered, "I suppose my grandfather was an attractive gentleman and _did_ have trouble keeping up with the ladies."

He was surprised when Korra spun away from him and asked, "You like Avatar Aang, right?"

Iroh raised both of his eyebrows and stuttered, "Well, of course….he ended the 100-year war and saved the world. And he was my grandfather's best friend, so yes, I respect him greatly."

The Water Tribe girl looked over her shoulder at him and batted her eyelashes. "You know, Aang and I are technically one person," she declared.

The general coughed nervously. _What was Korra getting at?_ "Yes," he replied, "I suppose spiritually, you are one and the same."

Then Korra was by his side, a gust of air propelling her to him. _She's getting better at air bending,_ he mused. Her athletic, tanned body was pressed against him and she poked his chest, "Did you know Aang and I's previous incarnate was Avatar Roku? He was Fire Lord Zuko's maternal great-grandfather."

Iroh was too busy trying to will away the accidental bulge in his pants. Since when did he ever feel this way for the Avatar? _How dishonorable!_ He tried to remind himself that he was now stiff for Avatars Aang, Roku, Kuruk and the entire male incarnates. That helped the rush of blood to his nether regions stagnate, but only a slight bit.

But gazing down at the voluptuous woman in front of him, the way she eyed him, and cooed to him…_Agni…_

Korra leaned in to blow in his ear and Iroh shuddered in delight. _Maybe taming the hot headed Avatar wasn't such a bad idea. _He wrapped his arms around her waist and succumbed to her soft ministrations. She continued to press kisses on his jaw line, his throat, and ears. The bulge in his pants was now pressed up against her thigh. _Screw honor,_ he thought.

Then she nipped his ear and whispered, "That makes me your great-great-great-grandfather."

The general's eyes flew open and he ripped himself away from Korra. Despite her pleas to stay, he rushed out of the gardens and made his way to the Temple for sanctuary.

He stomach churned and the back of his throat burned with bile as he slammed the doors behind him. Thinking of Korra now, he didn't picture a beautiful, tribal girl ready to give him anything he asked for…now he saw his old, wrinkly, bearded ancestor.

And most frightening of all, even _that_ didn't curb his arousal.

* * *

**The end! Man, I _love_ Iroh. He's such a fun character to mess with, because he's all serious and shit. So, that is the story. Done. Finished. Boom. Please review!**


End file.
